One of the Truest Test

I have had several of ........ what the heck is going on with life these last few weeks. from hospital stays, to heartbreak, to wrecking my car and now the overwhelming scare of driving down the hill to work or up the hill home. We are super busy at work so it isn't the best time to miss to much of it.  I have driven my hubs C R A Z Y with my what if's?? my over thinking?? my anxiety, and my tears!!! BUT even with my less than nice voice and my excuses... he has been there a 100%. He has drove me to work which is 35 minutes one way and then came back down and picked me up,  some days when I have appts he has to make that hour round trip drive 3x's in a day.  I have attempted getting back on the road, I drove the rental car a few days but then we had a little bit of snow come thru, nothing major at all few silly inches......it is the freeze that has me freaked out and the rental car isn't a familiar car for me so I am not showing any confidence to try and drive it in freezing conditions. Today and tomorrow the hubs is on driving duties again and even though he isn't happy about it that I get all worked up and think it is making him mad, he really isn't,  he is just frustrated that I tell him he's mad when he's not!!  I am just afraid it is putting him out and I feel bad for making him do it.... he would do anything in the world for me I know this with all my heart. It is the small things when shown that mean the most and his understanding with me even if it did make him angry I know he still would do them which to me is the truest test of love for sure.

sUNSHINE pROJECT

I couldn't get my photo to load so I will have to do this without a picture :(

Kimberlyat Kimberly's Korner Keeps us looking for the Sunshine each week with this great project along with Summer's story so click on the button and link up some sunshine because I don't know about you, but it has been some deary weather and I am ready for some Sunny thoughts TO READ.
  It's Thursday so that means it's time for The Sunshine Project. I hope some of you are thinking of linking up. Just link up something that has added "sunshine" to your week. Remember there are no rules! You can post about whatever makes you smile, a song, your kids, your family, your pets, a music video, friends or you can even post about making someone else smile.
Please put our button up with your post!

We have had some really cold weather, some snow last night (maybe a few inches) but it was

the freeze that makes it scary now for me. I had earlier in the week faced my terror with the rental car and just gone slow but it drives SOOOO different from mine that I am still not confident with the road. When we got the weather report yesterday for snow & then freeze I cried.

I KNOW THIS IS SUPPOSE TO BE A HAPPY Post......... it is.......:0

The drive down is 22 miles but because the road is so twisty it takes 35 minutes one way.

MY SWEET, WONDERFUL HUSBAND HAS BEEN DRIVING ME DOWN AND COMING BACK AND GETTING ME, HE DOES THIS WITHOUT ONE SINGLE COMPLAINT, IT IS AN HOUR ROUND TRIP FOR HIM EACH TIME AND ON TREATMENT DAYS HE DOES IT 3X'S.

HE IS MY HERO AND MY SUNSHINE FOR SURE!!!

 

Friday Follow Four Fill In 90!!

Welcome to the 90th weekly Follow Friday Four Fill-in Fun Blog Hop!

<center> <a href="http://feelingbeachie.com/" _mce_href="http://feelingbeachie.com/"><img border="0" src="http:// s1106.photobucket.com/albums/h363/feelingbeachie/?action=view¤t=followfriday_edited-2-1.jpg" _mce_src="http:// s1106.photobucket.com/albums/h363/feelingbeachie/?action=view¤t=followfriday_edited-2-1.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i1106.photobucket.com/albums/h363/feelingbeachie/followfriday_edited-2-1.jpg" _mce_src="http://i1106.photobucket.com/albums/h363/feelingbeachie/followfriday_edited-2-1.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></"/></a></center>  WOW 90 weeks of hosting that is so awesome Hilary, thank you, this is one of my all time favorite hops, some of my favorite bloggy buddies are here weekly and then YOU of course make it so great. Still sending you Prayers thru the clean-up process lady. Merry Christmas Hilary & Marc!!

Each week, Hilary plans on listing four statements with a blank for you to fill in on your own blogs. If you want to join the fun and come up with four fill in’s of your own, please email them to her at Hilary(at)feelingbeachie(dot)com. If she uses them, she will add you as co-host to the hop! This week’s co-host is Ali from the daughter-in-law diaries – she came up with the last two statements!
I would LOVE it if you could please help me spread the word about this hop…. So, please tweet, FaceBook share, and add the linky to your post…
This week’s statements:
1. I usually ___ but never ____
2. I was named ___because ___
3. I would never change _______about my body, but I would change _________
4. The last time I said “I Love You” was to _________

ANSWERS:
1. I usually paint my toe nails but never in the winter, I spend so much time in socks and the hot-tub they look dull so I keep them bare and moisturized.
2. I was named Janice because my dad liked the name, he named all us kids apparently my mom had trouble with names.
3. I would never change ANYTHING about my body, but I would (like to) change my health.
4. The last time I said "I Love You" was to  Jillian as we dropped her off at school this am and then my hubs as he dropped me off at work. I am on no driving duty this week from treatments so he is graciously dropping me off and picking me up and now to all of YOU......Love you GUYS & GIRLS!!!

Get Drunk?? WTH???

I do not drink very often, my husband hasn't drank in years, mostly because of the medications he takes but also he never was much of a drinker. He did like a cold beer in the summer time but even if he bought a six pack he rarely finished the whole thing. When he did drink he was happy & fun never mean or aggressive.  I liked that about him especially sense my 1st husband was an alcoholic & verbally abusive ( he quit after we divorced)  my step-dad was a mean drunk, physically abusive (I can not nicely say he was an alcoholic he was a drunk) so alcohol makes me nervous in men. In my twenties I bartended shocking yes but the money was good and it allowed me to work nights and be home with the kids during the day, but I DID NOT drink while working or after!! My boss liked that about me & I was a rare employee in that environment. I can enjoy life without adding alcohol. I do not need to have a few drinks to get out on the dance floor and boogie my butt off. I like to go to the clubs & dance, but I can go without drinking and have fun, YES I make an excellent sober driver. I don't need to feel tipsy to have the nerve to do anything... I have that nerve naturally!! yep I am secure like that....go ahead hate me now LOL

So when the Dr. told me Friday at my appt. to go home and have a few drinks and relax, I was stunned on what to drink, as a mixologists a zillion drinks roll thru my head??? I have a bottle of good wine at home. I keep a favorite in the fridge (it was bought 2 yrs. ago). But wine just didn't sound good, we have a super storm blowing right now so I kept thinking maybe a hot drink..... hot toddies, hot butter rums, hot chocolate with rum or peppermint schnapps eww no peppermint, Baileys & coffee?? I am cruising the alcohol isle in Raileys trying to get a feel of what would be delicious .... how about um....  no ....yuck.....then I got a glance of the items of booze on sale,  I see the sales tag of an old favorite that I enjoyed back in the day when we would go out and I didn't really feel like a drink just something to sip yes people there is sipping drinks!!! BUTTERSCOTCH schnapps yummy the perfect sipper over crushed ice YUM!! and then it also works in the hot chocolate again YUM.

As I pull up to the house, pouring rain, running for the steps and the cover of the porch, 

the hubs yells is there groceries?? 

Yes.... just a few bags do you got them?? 

He does, and then he asks the usual...did you get ice cream? whats for dinner? how did your appt.

go, what did the Dr. say, how are you feeling??

Yes I got ice cream and the creamer for the tea, I have those pork roast in the crock pot

you have been smelling all day. DUH that's whats for dinner.

The Dr. said for me to go home and get drunk!!

The Hubs....what ?? no he did not!! There is no way the Dr. said for you to get drunk?!?

Yes he did....... YES HE DID.......okay the stares got to me, 

so this is what the Dr. suggested (said.... suggested... geez)

I am knotted up and not sleeping well again, the news of this weeks tests have me wondering & worried, and just exhausted!! I am so tired of being tired.

The Holidays leave me a mess of a stress and never wearing a cute dress!! LOL 

ugh I just struggle during the Holidays.

The Dr. and I are talking about all this stuff and he looks at me and says ....I think you should go home have a drink , glass of wine, and relax!!! Allow yourself to just soak in a hot tub with a drink and relax!! So I bought me a bottle of some sipping booze had 2 glasses, sat in the hot tub while it poured rained and the wind blew and TRIED to relax.......it lasted about 2 hours.......that's a start..... 2 hours are better than  none.......

so if you see me out on the dance floor having fun just know it doesn't mean I am drunk  yep yep whoop whoop I am a crazy girl getting my groove on!!!